Today is part of a short week, only three days long, but its one of those short weeks where they're trying to pack at least 7+ working days of work into three days. There are so many moving peices right now its not even funny. Now I'm *somewhat* exempt from this, seeing as I am chaptering. I'm pretty much detatched, and I've gotten short timer's syndrome pretty bad. But even though I'm somewhat insulated from the stupidity I am not Imune to it.
Today i had an appointment at 0900, which was good because I missed out on the initial handing out of details. But not so good because I was sitting there a prime target for a particularly boring detail, where I had to highlight names all freaking day for people going through the "brain scan". It was some kind of test for people that sounded suspiciously like a TBI test.
I really might have been fine with it had it not, in fact been a COMPLETE WASTE OF MY TIME!!! I men despite the fact that I was getting people to highlight their names all day I wasn't there for the first two groups that went through, so the list was inaccurate. The best part, at the end of the day I simply took the list from the people running it and photo copied it so that the acting 1SG could have a copy. Essentially I wasted a whole day up at Battalion, annoying the shit out of people for something that I could have gotten at the end of the day!
I think even more important than that is the question of why on Earth I would be involved with packing a conex that I will absolutely not have anything to do with for a rotation to NTC which I won't even be here for, and I'm finding it hard not to ask "Why should I care?" Truth is that no matter what I do, no matter what I say this is going to be a hundred times more painful than it needs to be. SFC Hall has a nasty nack of getting involved and making things far harder than they need to be, and I can already see it now. I'm sure half the Connex will be packed and he will have forgotten one critical detail or have miscomunicated it to the junior NCOs, and we'll have to stop what we're doing, rearange it . . . really why should I give a crap.
I ask, in all honesty, what is the point of my assistance, seeing as I'm not trusted to do anything. This chapter, is, well Bull. I know DJ down at the hospital could have gotten me a Med board, and if they'd let me do my job I might actually be less mopey. I mean really, you take away my purpose for being in the army and wonder why it is that I act all down? really? and the Sleepwalking thing, you know its a common side affect of Ambien.
Its getting harder and harder for me not to find a shamtasctic reason to just skip out for the week, and not be involved period. If they think I'm not worth keeping around, why do I care about them? I can't answer it. I keep doing what they ask even though I want to bitch and moan more than ever. What really scares me is that, now at the end of this crazy ride, part of me, a quiet but large part of me, doesn't want to give it up. That thought is, somehow terrifying
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